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Steve Ballmer unleashes DOS 2010

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REDMOND, WA – Steve Ballmer unveiled DOS 2010 today, a disk operating system which he said would revolutionize the future of personal computing.

“We gathered all of the Windows 7 engineers in one conference room and asked ‘What can we do as an encore?'” Mr. Ballmer said to a gathering of roughly 1,200 Microsoft employees.

The engineers’ meeting resulted in the birth of DOS 2010, which Mr. Ballmer repeatedly called the “capstone project” of his career.

Mr. Ballmer demonstrated the systems many features, including what he called a “mouse-free user interface.”

“We’ve eliminated the need to operate a cumbersome mouse. Just keep your hands on the home keys. This baby is keyboard driven.” Mr. Ballmer said to a chorus of audible gasps from the audience.

Mr. Ballmer touted a new feature which would allow users to display 12-bit photographs within the system interface. “You can display pictures of people, places or things. It’s all about adding that personal touch.” Mr. Ballmer said.

The meeting concluded with Mr. Ballmer sitting cross-legged on the stage fielding questions from the audience. One questioner asked if the system came with a camera to allow users to take a picture of their favorite grandparent. Mr. Ballmer said DOS 2010 would not come packaged with a camera but promised to include one before the release of DOS 2020.

DOS 2010 is expected to be on store shelves by August 2012 at a suggested retail price of $2,010.

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Written by ikeusa

February 23, 2010 at 4:36 am